


Golden Winter

by MarvelGirl7



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Angst, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Fluff, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hurt, Kidnapping, Loss of Innocence, Protective Bucky Barnes, Sadness, loss of childhood, protective winter soldier, winter soldier fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2020-10-21 10:37:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 19,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20692127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarvelGirl7/pseuds/MarvelGirl7
Summary: *AU Story*You are not allowed to love or have emotions when Hydra owns you. Renee was taken by Hydra when she was 6 years old. Hydra couldn't wait to experiment on her. But lucky for Renee, she'd make a friend who would keep a watchful eye on her. The two would develop a friendship as well as something more. But Hydra doesn't allow their experiments to love.





	1. Chapter 1: They Will Break Her

**Author's Note:**

> I hope everyone enjoys this. This is different What if Version of Renee if you see I have a few of those on here, This story, The Protector and Little Star are all different AU What if Versions of Renee.  
Enjoy!

** _October 1997-_ **

That night seemed like any other night. That was till my mommy shoved me into a toy box.

"Be quiet stay hidden." She whispers as she shuts the lid. My eyes peak from the crack as strange people break into our home.

"Where's the child?" A voice asks as I see a man in a strange uniform ask my mother.

"You'll never find her." My mom says as I watch in horror as she gets shot to death. I quickly bury myself into the toy box.

"Search the place, we will not leave till the child is found." I shake and shake as I hear things being rummaged through and torn apart. I cover my ears hoping that would block the sound out.

"Hey, have you checked that giant box?" My heart starts racing as I hear the footsteps approach my box. I take a breath as the lid is opened.

"Found her." I start to scream as more men appear and stare me down.

"Look at how little she is. Why does Hydra want her again?" I start to shake as hands try and grab me, I bite at them and do everything I could to fight them off.

"Because she's supposedly powerful and has the Super Soldier Serum inside her." I feel a hand grab me hard. I let out a cry.

"Bit of a little fighter ain't she." One of the men chuckles.

"Well let's go. We got a long trip back to Siberia. Time for you to go to sleep little one." I try fight against my captors when one jabs me in the neck with something.

"Nighty night." I try and fight, but my body shuts down the fight I had dies with it.

"Sleep tight." I faintly hear as everything goes dark.

**=====================**

My eyes blink I feel groggily and cold. I look around I was in some strange room. I hear a door open as someone walks up to me.

"Ah your finally awake. You were knocked out for a while little one." I look up as a woman in black uniform eyes me.

"I got some food for you." She looks down at me as she sits the tray of food by me. I just scoot away from her as she sighs.

"I'm not going to hurt you. It's not me you need to worry about." She kneels down by me her eyes seem a bit softer than the men who took me.

"You can't be that old how old are you little one?" I look up at her eyes seemed sad for me.

"Six." She shakes her head and sighs. She nudges the food towards me.

"Eat." I just stare at the food as she sighs, she gets up.

"I'm Natasha you could call me Nat or Natalia whatever suits you." I just stare down not looking up at her. She just walks off as I look up at her.

"Renee..." I whisper. She stops and smiles at that.

"Renee nice to meet you." I just curl back into my ball and just cry in my hands.

I wanted my mommy back. I wanted my room back. I just wanted to not be scared and cold anymore.

**======================**

Natasha walks back in hours later and frowns.

"You didn't eat Renee." I look up at her and shake my head. She sighs.

"You need to eat please. If you don't, they'll send someone you don't want in here and he'll ensure you eat." I just shake my head. Natasha sighs as she picks up the tray.

"I'm going to warm it up okay. Will you eat it then?" I just shake my head.

"I'm glad you have fight in you, but this isn't the way." She looks at me sadly as she walks off with my tray of uneaten food.

**================**

This was like our daily thing. I refused to eat their food. No matter how hard Nat would plead with me I refused to eat.

"You know what has to be done." I hear from my doorway as Nat looks sad.

"Please just give me more time..."

"У тебя было много времени, Наталья. Пришло время встретить его." I hear some strange Language being spoken.

Nat just looks worried for me.

"He's not stable he could kill her." The man just smirks from my doorway.

"If he does, he does."

**==================**

Natasha walks into my room with a strange expression.

"Renee... Since you refuse to eat, we have to teach you a lesson." I look up at her.

"I warned you, Renee... He's not going to be as nice and patient like I was." I just look away as Natasha sighs.

"I hope for your sake he doesn't kill you." She whispers as she gets up and leaves.

I shiver in my room when I hear the door open again. I hear Natasha, she was angry and very firm.

"You will not harm her. You are to only get her to listen and eat. You will not hurt her you hear me, Soldier?"

"Это порядок. Вы не должны причинять ей вред." Natasha speaks in that strange language again. I just sigh.

"Понял." I hear a new voice speak.

"Alright Soldier." I hear the door close as I hear loud footsteps come closer. My body starts to shake as I slowly look up.

A tall man in dark gear stares me down. I notice something reflects off the light my eyes catch sight of his metal arm. I see a giant red star.

"Почему вы не подчиняетесь и выполняете приказы?" He says to me in a harsh tone. I stare up at him and just look at him. His eyes were dark and scary.

"Ответьте мне. Говори, когда говоришь тоже." I shake at his anger and just slowly look at him.

"I don't understand you," I whisper. His eyes don't change but his body relaxes more.

"You don't know Russian. Okay." I just stare at him as his cold eyes cut into me.

"Why don't you follow orders and obey? They tell you to eat you eat. You don't disobey." He growls at me. I just keep my head down.

"Look at me while I'm talking to you." I slowly peak up at him. I was scared, Natasha was right this man was scary and not nice like she was.

"Why are you so mean and cold?" His eyes widen at me as he marches up to me. He stares down at me his eyes full of rage. He lifts me up by my shirt.

"You will not speak to me like that. You will speak when I ask you a question. Understood?" I just stare at him. I was shaking.

"Why are you like this?" I whisper he growls at me as he sits me down. His eyes were angry. His metal arm was doing something strange. My whole body starts to shake as I start to really get scared.

"I'm sorry... I just..." His eyes just scare me as I shake on the floor.

"Are you going to kill me like they killed my mommy?" I whisper his breathing stops as he takes a step back.

"Natalia said not to hurt you just scare you." I look up at him.

"I'm scared. You won." I whisper. He makes a face as he sees me shaking. He walks over to the tiny bed that I sleep on and takes the blanket and drapes it on me.

"You have fight in you. They will break you little one, just don't fight them. Don't show them your fear either. They live for fear." I look up at him as he sighs.

"I don't want to hurt you; I don't want to scare you. But I will if I'm ordered too. Now, will you be a good little one and eat your food when Natalia brings it for now on?" I shake as I wrap the blanket tight around me. I look up as his once cold eyes had a little life in them now.

"Okay. I'll eat." He nods at that as he starts to walk away.

"I'm Renee," I whisper he stops and eyes me. I stare at him.

"I'm just Winter or Soldier." I nod my head and smile small at that.

"Winter is my favorite season. I love the snow." He just stares at me; I swear I saw a small smile form on his lips.

"Take care little one." He opens the door and leaves.

I sit back. The door opens again as Nat walks in. she smiles at me as she sits a bowl of soup in front of me.

"How about a nice bowl of Beetroot. It will warm you up." I look up and nod my head as I take the nice warm bowl and start eating.

"There you go eat." I smile at her. As she ruffles my hair.

**=====================**

**Winter Soldier's POV**

I stand outside the room as Natalia walks out. She nods her head.

"She's eating." I nod my head. I head back to my room when Natasha shouts at me.

"You almost smiled. Let me guess it was her brown eyes. Because they got me too." She smirks at me as I shake my head. I stare at her.

"Нет, ее воля." I say back in Russian as I walk off.

"They'll break her," Natalia whispers. I stop for a moment.

"They will try," I whisper back. 


	2. Chapter 2: Big Sis Little Sis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Issues arise :(

**Winter Soldiers POV**

My eyes go to the door as Natalia walks in. I eye her as she smirks at me.

"So, what do you think of her? I like her." I scoff and just shake my head.

"Don't get attached Natalia you remember the last one you got attached too." Her face changes as she looks away from me.

"You always get attached and then when they don't survive the tests you get sad. You know better we are not supposed to show emotion."

She stares at me with her green eyes as she shakes her head at me.

"You used to care." She whispers. I stare at her and just shake my head.

"Это была ошибка." Her eyes just fall as she gets up.

"You like her too I saw how you responded to her. She almost made you smile."

I stare at Natalia and just shake my head.

"No, I could care less about what happens to her. She's disposable. They'll just get another one to replace her."

Natalia just stares at me her eyes mixed of emotions.

"She's just a child a six-year-old little girl. This is the youngest they've ever brought back."

I eye her.

"How old were you Natalia when you started the Red Room?" Her body goes tense as she shakes her head.

"This isn't about me." I just smirk at her.

"Just don't let them see you care." She sighs.

"Do you ever wonder about your life before this?" I bite my cheek, so she wanted to be chatty today. I stare at her with my cold eyes.

"No, I don't care who I was and what I did before. I am who I am now." She looks at me with sadness.

"Maybe you are just a shell of a person. You used to at least be somewhat alive." I look at her.

"Проявление эмоций - это форма слабости. Я не слабый. Я их больше не показываю."

She goes to say something when a loud blood-curdling scream sounds through the halls. Natalia is quick on her feet. I jump up to follow her.

"Come on I just want to see you." I hear as Natalia barges in the room.

"What is going on in here?" One of the guards just turns and eyes us.

"I was just seeing what they brought back, tiny little thing. I wanted to see what was so special." My blood boils at that a feeling I didn't want takes over me.

"Renee, are you okay?" Natalia walks over finding her under the bed shaking.

"Renee it's me." She whispers Renee slowly peaks from the bed.

"Ah, I see, when she's older those brown eyes of her..." I quickly snatch him by his neck and pin him down.

"Вы не трогаете и не смотрите на нее снова. Ты меня слышишь." I growl at him as he smirks.

"Ah, Winter likes the little girl. Too bad she'll prolly just die anyway." I lose all my thoughts and just squeeze till I hear the neck crack.

Natalia looks up at me in shock. As those little brown eyes stare up at me in fear.

I didn't want her to be afraid of me and yet here I go snapping a guy's neck in front of her.

"He won't hurt you again," I mutter as I drag his lifeless body out of her room.  
**=====================**

**Renee's POV**

The man hadn't touched me or hurt me, tried but I was quick to crawl under my bed. I was glad when I saw Nat and Winter come when I screamed.

I stare after Winter as he drags that man's body out. Nat hasn't stopped checking me over.

"He didn't hurt you or touch you right?" I shake my head as Nat does something, I never expected she hugged me. I liked her hugs I realized I liked Nat.

"I like you, Nat." I smile at her. Nat cups my cheeks as she sighs.

"But you can't ever show them your emotions okay? Never let them know you have feelings or care." I nod my head as Nat hugs me tight.

"I'll do my best to make sure men like him never try this again." I nod my head as I eye where Winter left.

"He's kind," I whisper Nat eyes me shocked.

"Why do you say that?" I look up at her.

"He didn't have to care but he did." Nat just smiles at me as she kisses my head.

"You like him? The Soldier?" I nod my head.

"I like Winter." Nat smiles at that. As she holds my hand tightly.

"I think deep down he likes you too. He wouldn't just snap anyone's neck like that." She chuckles. I look up at her and just smile.

"Is this my new home?" Nat just sighs as she holds me close.

"I'm afraid so. I've always wanted a little sister." She whispers to me. I look up at her and smile.

"I've always wanted a big sister. It was always just mommy and me." She gets sad at that and holds me close. I lay my head on her chest and smile.

"Big sissy Nat." She chuckles and kisses my head.

"My little sissy Nee."

**===================**

I was getting used to this place. Nat made it to where we shared a room now. It was nice when I had the nightmares I'd crawl into her bed as she'd hold me tightly.

I hadn't seen Winter since that day. But I could feel him watching me, I could feel someone watching me and I was pretty sure it was him.

"Okay, Renee today I'm going to teach you ballet." Nat smiles at me. I look at her puzzled.

"Ballet? Like my old jewelry box?" Nat just smiles.

"Yes. I'm going to teach you ballet." I smile I always wanted to learn to dance.

"Why Ballet?" Nat just smiles at me.

"It's the movements the way you move will help you when you have to fight." I nod my head as Nat does some beautiful dance moves.

"Now you." I copy her the best I can. Nat smiles.

"Good form." I smile.

**=================**

The better I got the stronger I started to feel. One day Nat gives me a pair of Ballet slippers. I smile big as she helps me tie them and gets them on my feet.

"Happy early birthday." She chuckles and stops.

"When is your birthday little sissy?" I smile.

"December 16th." Nat smiles at that.

"We haven't missed it yet." She smiles at me.

I get on my slippers and smile as I finally am able to the toe point.

"Look at you go." Nat smiles.

"Now let's really see what she can do." Nat stops as a man walks in. He smiles at me.

"Hello, little Renee." He reaches out to touch me I back away. He chuckles.

"It's those brown eyes of yours. So captivating." I stare at him as he smiles.

"So pretty." Nat stands in front of me.

"Jonas... She's still learning and she's still young. She's not ready." He just smirks as he keeps his eyes on me.

"Oh, she's ready. I know what she's capable of." He whistles as a bigger man walks in.

"Alright, you know your orders attack." Nat shakes her head and stands in front of me.

"No. Jonas he'll hurt her or worse." He smirks.

"Natalia you will move now or be moved." Nat just stays firm by me. I shake as Nat doesn't stand down. I pull on Nat's arm.

"It's okay big sissy, I can take him." Nat just tenses up as she looks down at me. Her eyes filling with tears. She wipes them.

"Go big sissy I don't want you in trouble." Nat wipes her eyes as I smile up at her. She slowly moves from me as the big man gets in front of me.

"Gunter attack." The big brute comes at me I duck and squeeze through his legs.

"Remember your moves, Nee." I nod my head as Gunter comes for me again, I use the ballet moves Nat taught me as I get away from him.

This was making him mad. Gunter charges for me as I go to dodge him, but he grabs me and slams me hard into the ground.

"Jonas call it off." Gunter slams me harder into the ground. I struggle against him I try and try. I let out a cry as Gunter slams me harder again.

"JONAS STOP THIS." I hear Nat screaming.

I raise up my hand as a bright golden light shoots out and hits him. This startled Gunter as he stops, he growls.

"I'll end you now." I back away as he comes at me, he grabs me as I fight against him. I hear Nat yelling as I try to get my hand to do that again.

"Not so strong are we little one?" I feel tears trickle down my face.

"Too bad no one will save you." I close my eyes awaiting my fate.

"Не будь так уверен." I hear a voice my eyes open I know that voice. Gunter freezes as I see Winter. I feel a spark of joy surge through me.

Even though my body was hurting I smiled.

"Winter!" I squeak out as Gunter just drops me hard. I get scared as he sets his sights on Winter.

"No!" I grab his legs as he shakes me off.

"Don't hurt Winter," I yell as Gunter turns and chuckles.

"Oh, how cute. Look at this Soldat you have a little Protector. Want to watch me snap her in half?" I freeze as he lifts me up.

"Вы были бы мудры, чтобы положить ее вниз." Winter growls as he yanks Gunter as he drops me. I land hard on the ground. I watch as Winter drags Gunter somewhere. My eyes start to close as I year screams.

I feel arms lift me up as I feel a warm body carry me.

"I've got you brown eyes. Sorry I didn't get here sooner." I hear him whisper in my ear. I smile as I feel my body start to shut down.

"Just stay with me okay. I promise I'll keep an eye on you from now on." I just smile at his words as I close my eyes.

I finally felt my body at ease. No more pain.

Just Golden Light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no :(


	3. Chapter 3: Golden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Winter actually being cute in this

**Winter Soldiers POV**

I eye her little form; my eyes take in her little beaten body. Natalia was trying to keep her emotions at bay but seeing her like that broke her. My eyes watch as I notice cuts, and such start to heal.

"She's healing," I mumble Natalia eyes, Renee.

"Of course, she is healing. I expected no less." My body tenses as Jonas stands there. I keep my cold eyes at him.

"What are you saying? Nat snaps at him as he smirks.

"She has the Super Soldier Serum in her, like The Asset over here, it's a different form but it's mostly the same. I wanted to see exactly how much her abilities have developed." I want to strangle him right there.

"You wanted to see how a six-year-old could stand up against a man like him?" Natalia snaps as Jonas chuckles.

"She's done us proud. I'll be checking in on her as she grows." He walks over and runs his fingers over her face.

"Those brown eyes of hers are going to be the downfall of many." He walks off. As I just growl. I look at Natalia.

"We need to make a pact right here right now." She looks at me as my eyes go to Renee.

"We do what we can to Protect her. We can't let whatever Jonas has planned for her to happen." Natalia nods as a small smile forms on her lips.

"You do care." I just shake my head.

"In case they put me in Cryo again, keep her safe." She nods as she sighs.

"I hope they don't do that." She whispers.

**=========================**

**Renee's POV**

I recovered quickly and felt better. My body felt recharged. My hands I noticed started to glow golden and let out a strange power. I enjoy swirling my fingers around and making little golden things.

I didn't know how long it has been or how much time had passed.

"Oh, Little Sis." I look up as Nat walks in smiling. I smile big as she hands me a little wrapped gift. My eyes widen as I open it. A jewelry box with a dancing ballerina. I smile big.

"Oh, Nat! Big Sissy! Thank you." I hug her. Nat smiles as she kisses my head.

"It's your birthday today." She whispers. I look up it was December 16th? I take it all in and just nod my head and smile.

"Thank you." Nat smiles. My eyes go to the door as Winter stands there. I get up and rush to him I hug him. As he tenses. He still doesn't like to show affection or want to admit he has feelings.

"Hi, Winter." He grumbles as he hands me a wrapped box. I take it and smile as I open it. inside the box were four knives. Nat just rolls her eyes and scoffs.

"Knives? Really? She's 7." He looks at Nat and just eyes her.

"It's for her Protection. I'll teach her how to use these knives." I look up at Winter and smile. I run my fingers over the knives and smile.

"Thank you, Winter. I will make you proud." He just eyes me as I hug him. He grumbles again as I chuckle.

"It's okay to show affection." He shakes his head.

"No, you show affection they will hurt you." I shudder as he sighs.

"I don't mean to scare you Brown eyes, but they will. When it's just us sure show affection but when everyone else is around, you cannot show affection. Okay?" I nod as I grab his hand my golden power surges through me. I smile as I look at them.

"Look what I can do," I whisper as I swirl my fingers around as golden lights pop out. I smile as Nat and Winter share a look.

"What is this?" I shrug as I close my eyes and focus, I make a butterfly and smile.

"I can do things with my fingers." Winter just stares at my little power.

"Golden." He whispers I smile and nod my head.

"Isn't it cool." I smile big. Nat takes hold of my hand as I smile as that same feeling and surge goes through me.

"Golden power suits you." I smile as Winter nods his head.

"Little Golden." He cracks a tiny smile as I feel proud.

**=====================**

True to his word Bucky was teaching me how to fight and throw my knives. I was enjoying it.

"Форма помню." I smile and nod, I was picking up and learning Russian. I focus on my target as I throw my knife at it.

"Снова." I nod as I pull my knives out of the target. I take a breath as I focus again and throw my knives again. I smile big as I hit my targets.

"Look! I did it!" I smile big. Winter nods but stares at me hard.

"Do not get cocky. Remember Golden, no emotion." I nod my head and smile.

"Yes, Winter." He ruffles my hair and takes a breath. This was new he never ruffled my hair before.

"Я горжусь тобой." He whispers. I look up at him and hug his legs. He looks down as he slowly smiles.

"Come, let's get some food in you." I smile and follow him.

"Winter? Thank you." I whisper he stops and eyes me. He lets out a tiny smile.

"Don't think me yet Golden." I look up at him and just smile.

"Is that my nickname?" I ask as he stops and eyes me.

"You call me Winter, so I'll call you Golden. Maybe Golden-Brown Eyes." He starts to have some life and light in his eyes. I smile.

"Winter...." I eye him trying to figure out something to go with it. I stop and smile.

"Golden Winter." He smirks at that.

"I'm Golden Your Winter... We gotta give Nat a nickname." I think as Winter looks at me.

"Red Fox." I smile at that and nod my head.

"Golden Winter Red Fox. Our Names." I smile as Winter just shakes his head at me.

"You have an imagination Golden." I smile and nod.

I grab his arm and run my fingers over it. I pull out one of my markers. I start to doodle on it.

"There. A Red Fox, Golden Lights, and A snowflake for Winter." I smile up at him as he eyes his arm where I doodled. He laughs. I stop I've never heard him laugh before.

"You laughed. You should laugh more. I like it." He stops and just ruffles my hair again.

"Come on Golden, you deserve some food." He picks me up and throws me over his shoulder. I giggle and laugh.

"Don't drop me." He chuckles.

"I'll never drop you." I smile at that.

This may not have been the life I chose but with Winter and Nat, I was happy.

As long as I had them, I was going to be okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aww aren't they cute


	4. Chapter 4: Snow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty fluffy

**Renee's POV**

I was finally allowed to go outside every day now. I had loved being able to go outside and see what it's like wherever I was at. It was always cold outside but that was okay as I once told Winter, Winter was my favorite season.

I make little snowmen in the yard they let me out in. I smile at them.

"Renee aren't you cold?" I look over and see Nat she was bundled up. I shake my head and go back to my snowmen.

"I don't think I can last longer; tell you what I'll go make us some hot cocoa and I'll come get you when it's ready." I beam at that, hot cocoa.

"Sounds good big sis." Nat smiles as she heads back inside. I roll my snowmen and smile at them. They came out great, I think. I feel eyes on me as I tense my body up. I reach down for my knives around my belt and ready. I take a breath when I feel something cold against my neck.

"You need to be quicker Golden." I frown and huff as I turn and see Winter smirking at me.

"Not fair Winter." He shakes his head at me crossing his arms.

"If someone ever attacks you, they aren't going to be fair Golden." I roll my eyes at him as I go back to my snowmen.

"Renee..." He grumbles I ignore him.

"Golden... I'm only getting you prepared and ready for when you are older." I shake my head and add my finishing touches to my snowmen.

"Okay ignore me fine." I shake my head as I hear his footsteps walk away from me. I turn around his back to me. I smirk and roll up a ball of snow and get my aim ready. I take a breath and throw it as hard as I could. I watch as the snowball hits him in the back of the head.

He stops and just slowly turns around his eyes looked a mixture of angry and amused. He stares at me as I quickly roll another snowball.

"О, так ты хочешь играть?" I nod my head as he stares at me. I get my aim ready as I throw another snowball at him.

Bucky catches it with his hand. I freeze as he smirks at me.

"My turn." I back away and start running as I hear the snowball wiz by and hit me in the head. I turn around as Winter smirks at me.

"Oh, it's on Winter." I start rolling up snowballs. Another one hits me in the shoulder. I look around trying to spot him. I see a snowball come flying I duck as it fly's by me as I take a breath. He was out there somewhere I keep my snowball tightly in my hand as I look around.

My ears twitch as I hear something rustle. I get my arm ready as I aim and throw it.

"Got you," I smirk as I see if I can find him. I go to walk when I feel myself being lifted up.

"Got you." I laugh as he throws me up and catches me.

"You've been coming outside a lot Renee." I nod my head as I swirl my fingers around.

"I like being outside. I miss going to the park, going to the zoo." I whisper as his eyes soften.

"I know this place isn't much and what they did to you is unspeakable... But I and Natalia will do our best to make this home for you." I smile up at him and nod my head.

"I know." He sighs watching me.

"You don't deserve this Renee." I take his hand and nod my head.

"It's okay. I'm alive that's all that matters." I whisper as Winter just stares at me; he sighs as I send little golden snowflakes at him.

"You have a beautiful power. Don't let them ruin it." I nod as he helps me up.

"Come on your starting to get cold." I nod my head as I take his hand, the cold metal hits my skin he flinches as I smile.

"I like your metal arm and hand Winter." He smiles down at me.

"Your artwork washed away; I'll need you to doodle again." I smile big as we head inside.

"Finally, the cocoa is done!" I smile as I run to Nat. She hands a cup to me and one to Winter.

I smile taking a sip.

"Cinnamon!" I smile big as Nat ruffles my hair. I look over as Winter just stares at the cup.

"Drink Winter." He stares at it as he slowly puts his lips to the cup. I smile as he sips it.

"This..." He stops and eyes us.

"I've had this before." I smile.

"Your remembering." He makes a face as he drinks again.

"Steve." He whispers I look at him as he stares into his steaming cup.

"Was Steve a friend?" I whisper as he nods his head.

"My best friend." I smile.

"Your getting memories back Winter. That's good." He frowns at that as he looks at me and at Nat.

"No, once they find out I'll be put into Cryo again." He whispers. My heart sinks as I take his hand and shake my head.

"I'll Protect you." He looks at and just smiles a small smile at me.

"Little Soldier are we now?" I smile up at him.

"Golden Soldier," I smirk

**=================**

**Winter's POV**

My memories were starting to return. I close my eyes as more and more flashes of a life I had before started to return. Renee would write down everything in her little journal.

"So, you were a Sergeant in World War II." She smiles as she writes down stuff.

"Steve Rogers..." Natalia tenses at that as Renee stops.

"Wait I know that name... I had a book...." My eyes flash to Renee and Natalia as Renee thinks.

"Steve he was my friend..." Renee holds my hand as Natalia starts to pace.

"Your memories stay between us." She whispers. I nod my head as Renee stares at us.

"Do you remember at all what your real name maybe?" I stop as my mind searches. I close my eyes as I hear a voice faintly.

"_Bucky!" _I open my eyes and stare down at those big brown eyes.

"Bucky," I whisper she smiles at that.

"Bucky, it suits you." She giggles as I smile. Natalia takes a breath.

"I think we need to plan our escape." She whispers. I look at her.

"How do you propose we do that?" She sighs as I look over at Renee who was writing in her little journal.

"We make a plan and we escape the three of us." I Meet her eyes as I see how serious she was. Her eyes go to Renee who was clueless to everything.

"I don't want them doing anything to her. I know they will." I nod my head as I see her innocence still shining.

"Okay, so when do we start Natalia?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will their plan work?


	5. Chapter 5: Sickness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not so good things happen in this chapter :( sorry

**Renee's POV**

I was good about hiding my little journal whenever Winter well now Bucky would remember things, I was quick to write them down. I wanted his memories to stay, I was keeping a good record of them all.

"Bucky," I whisper quietly as I tiptoe in his room. I hear him talking in his sleep.

"I'm with you till the end of the line Steve." My ears twitch as I walk closer.

"Bucky," I whisper again. I sit on the edge as his eyes snap open and stare at me.

"You okay? You were talking in your sleep." I whisper he nods as he smiles at me.

"I'm okay, just dreams." I nod my head as he lays back. I smile as he stares at me.

"You should be in bed Renee." I nod but make a face.

"I didn't feel good." His eyes flash concern as he feels my head. He frowns.

"Your burning up. You were outside again without a coat, weren't you?" I look away as his steel blue eyes stare hard at me.

"You're sick." I shake my head as I sneeze.

"No, that serum in me will heal me." He makes a face at me as he sets up and throws the covers off him. He leans over and snatches me up.

"Bed for you." I pout as he carries me tucked in his arms. I snuggle in them.

"Renee... you need to be more careful. If you go outside wear a jacket or you're going to lose your outside privileges." I frown at him as I just snuggle deep his arms.

"Okay," I whisper suddenly feeling exhausted and sleepily. I feel Bucky's eyes on me as I yawn. He feels my head again and frowns.

"You're getting warmer." He opens the door to mine and Nat's room. Nat sets up her eyes go to me in his arms.

"Everything okay?" Bucky sits me on my bed and tucks me in.

"She's sick Natalia. She's been going outside without a jacket again." Nat frowns at me. I start to cough as Bucky and Nat's eyes widen.

"No... No..." Nat hovers over me. Bucky frowns.

"She has the cough. Then the cough turns..." Nat starts to panic as Bucky looks me over.

"Natalia relax." He whispers as Nat just paces and looks worried and scared.

"Как ты спокоен? Последний, у кого был этот кашель, умер.." She snaps at Bucky. I vaguely understood what she said.

"I'll be fine," I whisper as Nat looks worried. I start to get chills as I shake.

"I just need rest," I whisper as I cough more. Nat is pacing in front of the bed. Her hand on my forehead.

"No..." She looks at Bucky.

"It's the same illness as the other one." Nat starts to lose it. Bucky looks at her then at me.

"Renee just rests okay." He whispers as he tucks me in tight.

"Okay. That sounds good." I smile at them as I cuddle into my pillow and close my eyes. My body was sleepy.

**=================**

**Bucky's POV**

I watch as Natalia tries to stay strong and relax. But I know she's scared. I look at Renee her breathing was getting worse as she slept. I watch her little body shake as I watch Natalia start to tear up.

"Bucky... She's not going to make it." I take a breath as I storm off to get some help. I march into the medical wing.

"ВРАЧ! СЕЙЧАС!" I grow in the medical wing as one appears and eyes me. I march to him and yank him.

"ВЫ ПОЙДЕТЕ СО МНОЙ." I drag him all the way to Renee and Natalia's room. I shove him inside.

"Treat her, do what's necessary to heal her." I snap as the doctor looks at me and at Renee in the bed. He eyes her as he walks over. His hand touches her skin as Renee coughs and has trouble breathing. My eyes flash to her as the doctor checks her over.

"Open your mouth little one." He talks to her as he gets Renee's mouth open, he uses his little light and stares in her thought. He makes a face as he shakes his head.

"Diphtheria." He mumbles. He looks at us.

"How old is she?" Natalia just looks at him.

"She just turned 7." The doctor sighs.

"She should have gotten her diphtheria shot when she was six, but something tells me she didn't. With her being so little she needs those vaccines. At 6 is when most kids get those shots, she's been here since March, you said she just turned 7." I eye him.

"She should have been seen for her shots. Why didn't anyone bring her in?" Nat just looks distraught as I eye the doctor.

"Heal her. Fix her. Give her those shots now." The doctor sighs as he looks over Renee again.

"I need the Antitoxin and we don't have that. Sure, I can give her the vaccines she needed but that won't cure her. She's in the early stages of it now but... without that antitoxin, she will die."

Nat sobs as I feel my heart drop. I watch as Renee struggles to breathe. I look at the doctor.

"Where can I get the toxin?" The doctor shakes his head as he looks down.

"You can't." I feel the rage inside as I pull him up by his collar.

"What do you mean I can't? I will get that damn toxin JUST TELL ME WHERE!" I shake the doctor when I hear someone clear their throat. I look over and see Jonas and Vasily staring at us.

"By my orders. That toxin will only be used if she can prove she will live." My eyes widen at him.

"Excuse me?" Natalia snaps as Vasily eyes me.

"Stand down Soldat." I just stare at him.

"She's suffering she needs that medicine." I snap as Vasily eyes me.

"I said stand down Soldat that's an order." I glare at him as Jonas smirks.

"It would appear our Soldat cares for our little experiment." I about lose it when they call her an experiment. I glare at him.

"She's not an experiment." Jonas smiles at me.

"As I said before those brown of hers will be the downfall of many. Including you Soldat it seems." He walks in and looks at her.

"I do hope she pulls through." He runs his finger down her face as I snap at him.

"Don't you dare touch her." He looks at me and just smirks.

"Ah Soldat, your emotions are showing." He takes one last look at Renee as he looks at the doctor.

"You are not to give her any medical treatment not until she heals herself, if what she has in her DNA is true, she should be able to heal herself. If not, then she'll just die, and we wasted time and effort on her." He walks out as the doctor gives us a sad look.

"I'm sorry... I wish..." I growl as he storms out.

Natalia starts to cry as I try to comfort her.

"She's just a child... she... her body isn't strong enough." I hold her in my arms as she cries. I look at Renee who is fighting and struggling to breathe. I close my eyes feeling rage brewing inside me. Her little whizzing for breath kills me.

"I can't just watch her die, there has to be something." I stare at Renee and take a breath.

"We have to be strong and hope for the best."

"You're a fighter Golden. They haven't broken you. Fight this Renee."

Watching her struggle kills me. But I see she's fighting it. Natalia just cries in my chest as I hold her close.

"I can't lose her Bucky." I nod my head as I watch her chest slowly rise up and down.

"I can't lose her either Natalia."

**=================**

**Third Person POV**

"The Soldat is disobeying orders and he's showing emotions." Jonas just smirks at Vasily.

"Yes, he is. Just like I had planned. She will be the down of fall many. Including him Vasily." Vasily just shakes his head.

"Soldat and Natalia both are showing their emotions strong when it comes to the child. We need to wipe Soldat and dispose of Natalia." Jonas shakes his head as he eyes Vasily.

"No, The Soldat is falling into my hands as I planned. Attachment, he'll be attached to Renee. Once I see fit that it's time. Renee will learn a lesson, the lesson of never having emotion or love. We will take her Winter from her and she'll grow cold. As for Natalia, she's one of our best we will just send her away when the time is right. It's part of the plan Vasily."

Vasily just nods his head as Jonas smirks.

"Now we just got to hope little Renee is as strong as I believe she is. I'd hate for her to die."

Jonas just smiles at Vasily. As the two men walk off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no, Renee is sick and Bucky and Nat just have to watch her suffer :(


	6. Chapter 6: My Prince

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Renee is still very sick she's holding on. Will she get better?

**Bucky's POV**

I just watch her frail little body as she tried to breathe. My heart ached I wanted to take all her pain away. I had put Natalia to bed she had cried herself to sleep.

I told Natalia not to get attached and yet... here I was attached to this little bean. Attached to her little soul. I take hold of her hand and just close my eyes.

"Please, Renee don't give up your fight. You're the best thing to happen to us in such a long time. I didn't know such kindness, such a pure soul still existed." I whisper to her sleeping form.

"I'm not supposed to show emotion, I buried them away. Natalia tried, I gave in once and she got punished and hurt for it. I vowed never again... But... you weren't scared of me you looked at me like I was some hero. Your big brown eyes always looked happy to see me. You changed so much inside me Renee. I don't want to lose you little one. You have a full life ahead of you, you can't die. You just can't."

I hold her hand and just bury my face in it. I feel my eyes produce those things called tears. I kiss her little hand as I just squeeze it tight.

"I won't leave your bedside, Renee. I'll be here."

**=================**

The doctor came in later to check her over. I growled at him hating that he wouldn't do anything just let her suffer.

"Her body is fighting it. She's not out of the woods but there's hope." I just eye him as he looks at me.

"I don't like this any more than you do Soldier. But I can't do anything." I just glare at him as Renee fights to breathe. The doctor looks over at her.

"Coffee will open her lungs." With that, he nods his head and walks out. I watch as Renee coughs her eyes blink, she looks at me and smiles.

"Bucky." She barely gets out. I rush to her as she blinks at me.

"Hey, take it easy okay." I feel her head and just frown.

"I'm going to get you something to drink okay." She nods her head as I quickly leave to get her what that doctor said coffee.

"I know it won't taste great but please for me." She nods her head as I slowly tip the cup back for her. I made sure it wasn't too hot. She coughs and makes a face at me.

"I'm sorry." She giggles which causes my heart to beat fast she was laughing again.

"How are you feeling?" She just shrugs as I sigh, I get her to drink more coffee as I do notice a change in her breathing. I feel her head and sigh she was still warm.

"I'm sorry." I hear her faintly say my eyes go to her.

"Why are you sorry?" She looks at me as I take her hand and hold it.

"You have nothing to be sorry for Nee." She looks down.

"I went outside without my jacket. It's just... my body is always hot it seems when I wear layers it makes me hotter." She coughs a little. I just smile at her.

"Ah, Nee... It's okay. Really, just next time wear warmer clothes." Her eyes shine at me.

"You'll let me still go outside?" My heart just cracks hearing how excited she is. I nod my head.

"Of course, you can. Soon as your better I'll take you outside myself." She smiles at me as she looks a little better but still sick.

"Bucky? I love you." She whispers my heart jumps out of its chest. I lean up and kiss her head. She smiles as her eyes flutter.

"Sleep." I whisper she nods her head.

**======================**

Natalia just stares at her as Renee hasn't woken up in a long time. Nat holds in her tears as she kisses Renee's head.

"She's not going to make it," Natalia whispers as my eyes go to her. she wipes her eyes.

"You don't know that." Natalia just stares at me and shakes her head.

"She hasn't woken up in hours Bucky. She is never waking up again. It's just like last time." Natalia just gets up. She looks at Renee's sleeping form as she shakes her head.

"I can't watch her die." She walks out.

I close my eyes as I watch Renee's chest slowly rise up and down. I close my eyes as I remember something.

_"Steve, you need to breathe. You can't take too much." _I open my eyes as I look at Renee, she was weak and frail like Steve was in that memory.

"Hey Nee, just open those big brown eyes of yours okay. I promise I won't be a grumpy jerk ever again to you."

I lean over and kiss her head. I feel my eyes water as I kiss her head gently.

I sit back as I bury my face in my hands, I start to just lose it all. Renee didn't deserve any of this.

"Bucky?" My eyes flash up as I hear Renee's little voice. She stares at me and smiles.

"You're a prince." I eye her funny as she smiles big at me.

"You kissed my head and now I'm awake." I smile as she looks at me.

"Someday I'm going to marry you Bucky." I stop and eye her and shake my head.

"No, you'll find a good man. A true prince." She shakes her head holding my hand.

"You're my prince. Your kiss woke me up." I just smile and lean over and kiss her head again.

"We'll see how you feel when you're older." I notice her head wasn't warm anymore. I smile.

"Your fever is gone," I whisper as she smiles at me.

"I feel much better."

Natalia walks in as I eye her. Her eyes widen when she sees Renee awake and smiling.

"Nat!" She rushes over and holds her close.

"Nee!" She kisses her head all over.

"You're not warm anymore." She holds her tightly. As I smile watching the scene unfold.

"Jonas needs to know so she can get the toxin." She stands up fast rushing out. I look over as Renee smiles.

"You won't be a grumpy jerk anymore." She smirks at me. I stop she heard everything. I smile.

"Nope. No grumpier jerk from me Nee." She smiles big at me.

"Good, I like you being this way." I ruffle her hair and just feel relieved she was going to live. She wasn't going to die. She was going to have a long life. We would escape and get her a life she deserved.

"And someday Bucky you will be my husband." I chuckle at her as I stare at her.

"Okay, Little Doll." She smiles big and proud of me.

"Good." She nods her head at me. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be Still My Golden Winter Heart


	7. Chapter 7: Mr. Rochester

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a cute little chapter :)

**Renee's POV**

I was finally 100% better. I felt so much better. I was back outside Nat had knitted me a little beanie where she even found things to make it, I don't know. I loved my little beanie it felt warm on my head. I wasn't sure where everyone was, but I was having fun. It warmed up a little but not a lot.

I was sad because Bucky and Nat had been sent off on a mission. I wanted to go but was told a mission was no place for a young kid. Whatever that means. I missed them, but they made sure that no one dared touched or messed with me while they were gone.

I've slept with my knives under my pillow since they've been gone.

A chirping sound causes me to stop and walk over. I see a bird. I bend down and eye the little bird and smile.

"You're the first animal I've seen out here." I smile as I notice it's hurt.

"Are you hurt?" I slowly pick the bird up and hold it gently.

"I'm sorry." I feel a power surge through me as I place my hand on the wing and watch as the wing starts to heal. The bird looks stunned at me as it just stays in my hand for a moment. I smile as I watch it stretch out its wings and look at me.

"See if you can fly." The bird chirps at me as it flaps its wings. I smile.

"Come on fly. It's okay." The bird keeps singing at me. I chuckle as I perch it on my fingers.

"Fly little bird." It finally flaps and away it goes. I smile watching the bird fly around.

"You can be free," I whisper watching it. I smile as I go to my little spot. I pull out one of the books I've been assigned or well allowed to read.

For some reason, they deem it necessary I start schooling and teachings one of the books they had given me was Jane Eyre. They were impressed that I was able to read and understand it at 7 years old. I had fallen in love with Jane and Edward Rochester. I pull out the old worn book and start to read where I left out. The instructor or whatever you'd call it feels it's a great book for me to start out and read.

I've fallen madly in love with it. the romance of it all. For some reason Edward Rochester reminded me of Bucky, they were both moody and brooding. I flip through the book as I hear chirping again. I look up the bird returned. I smiled.

"You shouldn't be here," I whisper as the bird chirps at me. I smile as it lands on my shoulder. I decide to read out loud to the bird. I smile at the bird and turn to one of favorite parts in the book. I really loved this quote.

"I am no bird, and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being with an independent will." The bird sings at me. I smile.

"You better go now little birdy... If they find you..." I whisper as the bird just sings at me and flaps its wings at me.

"Yes, your wings are beautiful. You can fly now go." The bird just flaps at me as I hear footsteps.

"Go little bird." The bird finally fly's off my shoulder as I look up at the footsteps.

"Who were you talking to?" I look up at Bucky and smile.

"Bucky!" I run and hug him tight.

"Little Doll who were you talking to?" I look up at him.

"A bird." He eyes me hard as he looks around, he walks around where I was sitting. I eye him strangely as Bucky stocks around the little yard.

"Bucky it was a bird I healed it and it liked me." He stops as he walks to me.

"Healed it? What do you mean?" I look up at his face I notice all the cuts.

"Like this." I place my hand to his face as I focus on the power. Bucky just stares at me as the cuts on his face heal.

"No more cuts." Bucky's eyes soften as he pulls me into a hug.

"You are full of surprises Little Doll." I smile as he stares in my eyes.

"Renee promise me something... Don't ever show them your power, please. Don't let them know you can heal." I stare at him as he pulls me close.

"I don't want them to ever hurt you or make you do something you don't want too." I nod my head at him as he ruffles my hair.

"Was your mission okay?" Bucky nods he sighs.

"Natalia had to stay behind to clean up some of the mess, but she'll be back soon." I frown but nod.

"I'll be scared without her." Bucky stops and eyes me.

"I'll stay in your room with you okay?" I nod and smile big at that.

"Can I read to you?" He smiles and nods.

"I'd like that."

**================**

**Bucky's POV**

I hated lying to Renee but she's still a child, she doesn't have a filter plus I don't want to get her hopes up. But Natalia was trying to find some ways for our escape why she was staying behind.

I smile down at Renee, she's only 7 but I swear she's growing and aging fast it feels like. I watch her as she skips happily around.

Her ever-growing powers worry me. I don't want them ever finding out about her power.

I watch as she plays and smiles happily. If being forced to live and being forced to see your mother murdered hasn't made her cold and emotionless, I truly believed nothing would.

Renee's heart was pure Golden, she had a Golden soul. No matter how hard they tried I don't think they would ever break her.

I hoped anyway.

**================**

I chuckle as Renee piled the pillows she had as she made herself a little fort. She looked at me and smiles.

"I like my pillows." I chuckle as she pulls out her book.

"I can really read to you?" I nod and smile.

"Of course, Little Doll." She smiles big at me as she starts reading her book to me. I watch as she takes a deep breath and starts her reading.

"There was no possibility of taking a walk that day. We had been wandering, indeed in the leafless shrubbery."

I close my eyes as I listen to her little voice read me this book.

**================**

"You remind me of him Bucky, Mr. Rochester." I stop and eye her and chuckle.

"Do I huh?" She thinks for a moment as she smiles.

"You both are moody and broody," I smirk as I lay back on Natalia's bed.

"Am I?" She nods her head as I chuckle.

"I'm moody and broody hmm." She laughs at me as she reads a part of the book to me. She looks at me.

"This quote reminds me of you and me how I feel you treat me." I eye her as she reads it to me.

"I do not think, sir, you have a right to command me, merely because you are older than I, or because you have seen more of the world than I have; your claim to superiority depends on the use you have made of your time and experience."

I stop. Such big powerful words coming from a 7-year-old. I stop and eye her.

"I'm sorry if you ever feel I command you Little Doll, but like Jane is saying I'm much older and have seen what this world is truly like. So yes, I will do my damned to ensure you are Protected and safe." I eye her as she just nods her head.

"I know... But I won't be little forever." I sigh and nod my head.

"I know." She whispers.

I feel a pain in my chest as I realize Renee won't be little forever, she'll grow and grow, one day she'll be a young woman. I shudder as I know what sometimes happens to young girls here.

With Renee's abilities and such... They'd definitely want to... I shake my head don't even go down that road, we are going to escape the three of us. That will never be her fate.

**===============**

I'm shaken later that night by Natalia. She sits on the edge of the bed and sighs.

"I take it you didn't find any good news?" She shakes her head.

"They'd take me and Renee in but not you. Only women and children at this safe place." I take a breath.

"Maybe that's not such a bad thing... You two get out of here and well..." Natalia shakes her head.

"No, we are not leaving you. We live together or not at all." I sigh this stubborn woman.

"Natalia... Renee and you deserve a better life than this. Renee deserves to have a normal childhood. You deserve to have a normal life that a young woman your age should experience. Go without me."

Natalia shakes her head.

"No, we are a team... We are... a family." She whispers. My heart just jumps as her green eyes filled with sadness.

"We can't leave you behind." I sigh as I stare at her.

"Renee is growing stronger and stronger every day... The older she gets... and once she's of age you know what they'll want to do to her." Natalia shakes her head.

"You don't know that... They might just take that away from her." I stare at Natalia.

"Would you want that for her?" Natalia shakes her head as she wipes her eyes.

"Besides, they won't. with that Super Soldier Serum inside her you know they'll do it. You know she'd be perfect for it." She looks away and just sighs.

"We'll find another way Bucky... One where we all get to go." I just sigh.

"And if you don't you and Renee will take that safe place. Understood?"

Natalia just nods.

"Understood."

I nod my head as I look over at Renee sleeps soundly.

"Whatever it takes to ensure she gets her best shot at this life," I say as I watch her sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhoh... What does Bucky think Hydra will do to Renee once she's of age? Let me know what you think


	8. Chapter 8: Lesson Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING This chapter is rough and heartbreaking :(

** _-3 Years Later-_ **

**Renee's POV**

Nat wakes me up smiling.

"Happy 10th birthday Nee." I smile at her as she hands me a wrapped gift.

"What is this?" Nat smiles at me as I unwrap it my eyes take it in. She got me books.

"Books!" I eye them

"Little Women, Pride & Prejudice and The Great Gatsby." I smile big as Nat just chuckles.

"Your Jane Eyre copy and Wuthering Heights are getting worn maybe time for a break." I smile and nod my head.

"Thank you." I hug her tight as she kisses my head. A slight knocking causes our eyes to meet the door as Bucky stands there, I smile big at him.

"I heard its someone's birthday." I smile big as he walks in. I jump off the bed and run to him as he catches me in his arms.

  
"Oh! You're getting too big for this." I chuckle as I wrap my arms around his neck and hug him tight.

"Happy Birthday Golden Brown Eyes." I smile as he sits me down. He hands me something. I eye it as I slowly unwrap it.

"You love to write and draw. So, I got you some notebooks and such." I smile big and look up at him.

"Thank you, Bucky." He ruffles my hair. He stares at Nat as they share a look. She nods her head as I look between them confused.

  
"Everything okay?" Bucky nods as Nat smiles.

  
"Everything is fine." I just nod not sure I believed them.

**==================**

**Bucky's POV**

I leave Renee and Natalia as I walk down the hallway. I stop as I hear Jonas and Vasily talking. I listen.

"So, it's true then. Her parents, that woman we killed that night wasn't her mother at all. How did we miss that? Does anyone else know that she's their daughter?"

"No just us." I freeze what were they talking about?

"Then it stays between us... Beside Renee has been coming along well... She's just turned 10 today... Soon before we know it, she'll be of age for what we have in store for her." I hold my urge to break in there.

"Any idea who will be a great match for her so we can ensure the process works?" I close my eyes feeling rage.

"We'll cross that bridge when she gets closer in age."

I wanted to kill them both were they stood hearing them talk like that about Renee... I close my eyes as I take a deep breath.

No matter what that was never going to be her fate.

Today we leave.

**===================**

**Renee's POV**

I sketch in my book and smile. I look up as Bucky smiles at me.

"You like your notebooks?" I nod my head and chuckle as he sits by me.

"Good." He eyes my little doodles and smiles.

"Steve used to draw too." He whispers I reach for his hand and squeeze it.

"Steve sounds like a great friend." Bucky nods.

"He was the best." I smile as I lay my head on Bucky's shoulder.

"I never want this to end." Bucky smiles at me as he kisses my head.

**======================**

I feel someone shake me gently later that night as I blink and see Bucky. Nat was busy packing things in a bag.

"What's happening?" I whisper rubbing my eyes. Bucky gently lifts me up.

"We are going away." I just yawn still sleepy.

"Okay." I nod. My voice was still full of sleep. Bucky just carries me as Nat nods at him.

"Ready?" He whispers to Nat as she nods her head. I just yawn again burring my face in his chest. 

"Just rest Nee... We'll take care of everything." I nod my head as I feel my eyes close again.

**=====================**

**Bucky's POV**

Natalia and I quietly walk down the halls as we get our escape underway. Renee was asleep in my arms, which was fine this way she couldn't ask questions and she'd be quiet.

"Just a few more steps." I nod at Natalia as I smile.

"Just think a new life a new start for us." Natalia smiles at that.

"A good life for her, one where she can be a kid." I smile at that and nod my head.

"Let's go get that life." I smile at her as I reposition the sleeping Renee.

"Did you two think we wouldn't find out." My body runs cold as I hear him.

"You two can go we won't stop you, but you must leave her. She cannot go with you." He points to Renee.

I tighten my hold on her as Jonas smirks. Vasily comes forward as I see guards come up and surround us.

"What will it be Soldat?" I look at Natalia her eyes sad as she just looks down, we were finished. We were caught. There was no way we would leave her.

"We won't go without her," Jonas smirks as he nods his head. Guards grab Natalia as he eyes me.

"Wake her up. It's high time she finally learned her lesson." My eyes widen as one of the guards tries to take her from my arms. With my metal arm, I snap his neck as I keep my hold on Renee with my other arm tight.

Renee blinks as she smiles at me.

"Bucky." She smiles at me.

My heart breaks seeing her happy brown eyes. I failed her. Now God only knows what would happen to her.

"Ah, your awake little one." Renee looks over as Jonas smirks.

"Time for you to learn a lesson, Renee." He snaps his fingers as guards grab me. Renee looks scared.

"Good comply Soldat... Time for you and her to learn your lessons." One of the guards grabs Renee as he takes me and her away.

"Where are you taking them?" Natalia shouts as Jonas just smirks.

"Oh, you'll see."

**======================**

Renee looked scared as they dragged us to this place. I close my eyes I knew what was going to happen.

"Little Renee, you've been with us three years now. What has and always been the one rule of Hydra?" I want to snap his neck as he walks around her.

"Obey orders." She whispers Jonas nods.

"Ah, but what was the most important?" Renee meets my eyes as she looks at Jonas.

"No emotions, love is a weakness." Jonas claps and smirks.

"Ah yes, good girl. You have been listening. But it would appear, you, Soldat, and Natalia all disobeyed that rule."

Renee's eyes cast down as I try and get to her.

"It was my fault, don't punish Nat or Winter. Punish me." She says not showing any fear. Jonas just smirks at her.

"Ah well, aren't you cute. You shall see your punishment."

"Are you ready Soldat?" My eyes go to Renee who looks so scared.

"Please don't hurt him." My heart aches for her.

"Well, aren't you a little Soldier." Jonas taunts her as I try to fight them off.

"I think it's time for you to learn your lesson."

**==================**

**Renee's POV**

I was shaking and scared as they placed Bucky in restraints

"Please no," I whisper as Jonas just smirks.

"Time for you to learn your lesson little Renee. Emotions and love are a weakness, a weakness we do not allow at Hydra."

My eyes lock onto Bucky's as he tries to reassure me. I feel so scared and helpless.

"Ready the Cryo machine." I try and fight the guard holding me.

"NO! NO!" I scream as I watch as Bucky is taken.

"NO!" I scream as his blue eyes lock onto me. He gives me that smile as he nods his head.

"Я всегда буду здесь, Рене." I feel my eyes water as I break free and rush to him. His hand rises up as I watch as Bucky gets frozen. I fall to my knees and start crying.

"Oh, little one." I feel Jonas run his fingers through my hair. I flinch as Jonas smirks.

"See what emotions and love does to you?" I glare at Jonas as he smirks.

"Come along let's let her learn her lesson." He walks out with the guards as I stare up at frozen Bucky. I slowly stand up and place my hand against the glass.

"I'll save you Bucky, just you wait," I whisper.

My eyes fill with fury as I realize what my plan of action is.

They won't break me.

Let them try. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :( I know I know :(


	9. Chapter 9: The Archer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone likes this chapter enjoy

**Renee's POV**

Life moves on as much as I didn't want too...

They let Nat stay with me for now... They didn't separate us which made me happy, but I still missed Bucky every day.

Every chance I got, I would sneak down and sit by the cryo machine. I flip open a book.

"What will it be today Bucky? I was thinking some Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy?" I take a breath and start reading to him. I know he can't hear me or anything but reading to him makes me feel better.

"I thought I'd find you down here." I look up as Nat sits by me. I close the book and sigh.

"It was my fault. He didn't want to show emotions and yet I made him." I whisper. Nat frowns at me and shakes her head.

"No Renee none of this is your fault. Don't ever think it is." I just sigh as she holds my hand tight.

"What do we now?" I ask as Nat just looks up at Frozen Bucky and shrugs.

"We live and survive." I nod my head as I stare up at Bucky.

"And someday save Bucky."   
**====================**

** _-3 Years Later-_ **

At age 13 I was finally allowed to do missions. Natasha and I did our best to avoid doing things we didn't want to. When I could I'd disobey and help those who needed it.

"This guy hasn't gotten off our tail." I eye Nat as an arrow fly's by our head.

"I don't miss ladies, that was a warning." Nat turns back and eyes the archer.

"Well, maybe you shouldn't warn us." Nat puts me behind her as the archer eyes us.

"Jesus, how old are you two? She can't be any older than I'd say 12. And you must be in your early 20's?" Nat just stares at him as I peak at him.

"I'm 13." His eyes soften as he takes a breath.

"You're just a baby." I glare at him as he sighs.

"Look, why don't you two come with me? I can get you two to a safe place." Nat eyes him as she looks at me, she shakes her head.

"Sorry, no can do." She grabs my hand as we run off.

**===================**

As we take shelter in our little place while on this mission, I eye Nat.

"He seemed like he was kind." Nat shakes her head as I sit on the worn cot.

  
"Just because someone seems kind doesn't mean they are." I sigh as Nat looks out the window.

"I'll take first watch you sleep." I just nod my head.

**================**

"Hey, Nat..." I ask as I peak up at her as I lay there.

"You should be resting." I roll my eyes as I slowly set up.

"Would you want to ever escape again?" Nat tenses but stops her eyes kind on me.

"I would, as long as you went with me." I smile as my mind goes to Bucky. I get sad.

"Hey, I know that face don't. He'd want you safe and away from all of this." I just nod my head.

But I knew I'd never leave without my Bucky. My Winter Prince.

**============**

Nat shakes me awake as we rush out of our little place.

"That archer found us." Nat and I run as another arrow whizzes by us. I shove Nat out of the way as the arrow just lands next to us.

"Again, if I really wanted to hit you, I wouldn't miss." I turn and eye him as he smiles at us.

"I'm serious ladies let me give you a better life. I promise I mean you two no harm." Nat just eyes him as I look at him.

"You promise," I whisper he nods his head.

"If I wanted to you both would be dead by now." Nat slowly nods her head.

"If you betray us, I swear I'll kill you." He chuckles and nods.

"You remind me of my wife." He smirks as Nat beckons I follow.

This was it. This was our shot finally freedom. I move my feet but stop.

"Renee come on." I look up at Nat and shake my head.

"No, you go. I have to stay." Nat stops her eyes widen.

"Renee we will come back for Bucky I promise but right now, you... Your safety is what matters come." She pulls on my arm, but I don't budge.

"Ladies come on." I shake my head.

"You have to go Nat; you know they are getting ready to get rid of you from me. Nat, you have to go. Please." Nat starts to tear up as I smile up at her.

"I'll be okay, you taught me everything you know. I can Protect myself from all of them. Besides, you'll have me from the inside and maybe we can take them down."

Nat pulls me in her arms as she starts to cry. I hug her tight.

"I'll be okay Nat, you'll see. I can do this." I hold her tight.

"Let me go Nat." She cries as she pulls back and stares at me.

"Soon as its safe you make contact." I nod my head. Nat just holds it all in.

"Nee, he won't be the same when he gets unfrozen." I nod my head

"I know, but that's okay I'll make him remember again. He can't wake up alone."

Nat just smiles as she holds me close.

"You are too pure for this world." I smile as I place my hand on her face letting the warmth of my golden power surge through her, showing her, I'll be okay.

"I'll see you again Nat. Who else will be my big sissy?" Nat nods as she closes her eyes tears falling down them.

"I love you, Nee." I smile at her.

"I love you, Nat." She kisses my head. I look at the archer.

"You hurt my big sissy and I'll make you sorry." He stares at me as I smile at Nat and take off heading back to them. To it all.

I could have been free. I could have been rid of this place...

But not without Bucky.

Not without My Winter Prince.

**================**

I told some sad tale that Nat had been taken by the archer. I learned he was a part of some organization called Shield whatever that was.

I made contact with Nat soon as I knew it was safe. We spoke in codes when we could.

Nat was safe and living a life she deserved finally.

I lean my head against the Cryo machine and sigh.

"Maybe I'm stupid for not going but I couldn't leave you Bucky. I won't leave this place without you." I whisper as I stare up at him.

"So, what will it be today? Wuthering Heights? I could go for some moody Heathcliff." I smile as I flip open my worn book.

"Someday when you wake up again, I'll be here Bucky. I'll always be here." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh Renee :( You pure Golden Soul you


	10. Chapter 10: New Assignment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone is ready!

** _-7 Years Later-_ **

I take a breath as I slowly get out of my bed. I grab one of my many books and make my walk.

When I was 16, they suddenly moved us all to a new place a new location. I was back in America I had been living in DC for the last four years now.

I place my hand on the machine and close my eyes.

"Good morning Bucky," I whisper as I lean my head against the machine.

"So, I'm thinking Jane Eyre again today. It's my favorite and I think it's yours too." I smile as I start reading.

**=====================**

I sit in a little coffee shop. They had started to trust me more when I turned 18. I was finally allowed to leave and go off on my own. Which was great.

"You look good today." I smile as Nat sits behind me acting like she's a customer.

"It was a good day." I stir my coffee. Nat sighs as she takes a breath.

"Nee... They found something.... Well someone. Alive and frozen for over 70 years." My eyes shoot up.

"Steve." Nat nods as she sighs.

"Nee... It's been 10 years... I don't think they'll ever unfreeze him... Come with me, please. Get out of there." I stare down at my coffee.

"We can make a plan and rescue him..." I slowly nod my head.

"Okay. But I have to go back for now... I need to get something." Nat just smiles as I catch it.

"It's always good seeing you, little sis." I smile at that.

"Always good seeing you big sis."

**================**

I walk through the halls as some agents smile and wink at me. I shake my head.

Try as they might, they never would get me.

There was only one man I'd ever let have me. And none of them were it.

"Good to see you Little Golden." I roll my eyes as Rumlow smirks at me his eyes running down my body.

"Rumlow," I mutter. He just smiles as I bypass him.

"Ah don't be like that Renee. Why can't you just give in to your feelings and wants for me." I stare at him as I shake my head.

"One would have to have feelings in order for that to happen." He places a strand of my hair behind my ear as he stares down at me.

"Renee, it's only a matter of time. Besides, I hear they have something great planned for you and me." I eye him as he traces my cheek. I grab his wrist and slowly bend it.

"Touch me like that again without my permission, and let's see if you still have a hand." His eyes darken as he whispers in my ear.

"And that my dear Golden is why I want you." He smirks as he stalks off. I shake my head as I head into the little area to train and work out.

I focus all my energy on the punching bag. They know I can use my golden power for some things, but like I promised Nat and Bucky they never found out about my healing power. I made sure of that.

I close my eyes I didn't want to leave Bucky all alone here. But maybe Nat was right. It had been 10 years... I close my eyes and focus on the bag.

"Renee." My mind stops as I look over and see one of the newest agents.

"He wants to see you." I stop. No one really knows who "He" is. Rumlow says he does but who knows. I nod my head as I follow the agent down the hall. He opens the door for me. All I see is a shadow with his back to me. The room was very dark.

"You've done well here since becoming one of us when you were six. You've made us all proud of, with your achievements and abilities. I feel that it's time we gave you this assignment. I feel you are ready for it."

I tense wondering what he wanted from me. I see him slide a folder to me. I pick it up my eyes widen.

"When you were a child, maybe you don't remember, but you were very close to him. Our Asset. I wouldn't expect you to remember him. We want you to be in charge of him. You will watch out and take care of him. Ensure he is complying with his missions and orders. He's been in Cryo now for over 10 years."

My heart was racing as I nodded my head at him. This was my chance. This was my shot.

"Yes. I'll do it." I see him nod his head.

"Good. Head down to the Cryo machine we are unfreezing him today."

My heart races. Today I would finally see Bucky again.

**==========**

I take a breath as I walk down there. Rumlow smirks at me as I stand to the side.

"Heard "He" made you the babysitter." I roll my eyes as Rumlow chuckles. He peaks over at the file.

"Not bad on the eyes. But remember you're my girl." He winks I just glare at him. I take a deep breath as they prepare the machine. I watch as the one scientist guy types some things in the machine. I take a breath.

"Alright in 5....4....3....2...1..." I watch as the machine comes alive. My eyes watch it all as it makes some sounds.

"Ready to open." My heart races as the door open. I take a deep breath as a couple of men pull him out. I rush quickly.

"Give him so air." I snap as I look at him. Bucky looked so confused and scared my heart broke. I lean down.

"You're okay. You're just waking up from a long slumber." His eyes stare up at me.

"Let's do some tests and make sure he's okay." I nod my head.

**===================**

I sit by his bedside as his eyes blink open. I smile and look down.

"Hey, you." His eyes stare up at me. I smile as I study him. Nothing looked different, he looked exactly how I remembered him.

"How do you feel?" He just stares at me. I sigh Nat had warned me he wouldn't remember anything.

"I'm Renee," I whisper as his eyes just stare at me. I pull out one of my books.

"Why don't I read to you?" His eyes just take me in. I smile and just start reading.

**===================**

I was finally able to get away for a few as I went back to the coffee shop.

"Plans have changed Nat," I say as I lean back against my seat.

"What's changed?" I take a breath.

"They woke him up." Nat stops sipping her coffee. She takes a breath as she acts like a normal customer.

"I see... I take it you aren't leaving now, then are you?" I sigh as I stir my coffee.

"I can't now. I got to get him better. Then I'll leave with him." Nat takes a breath as she nods.

"Okay... But Renee... It's not going to be easy." I sip my coffee.

"I know."

**==================**

I head back to my room as I open it, I freeze seeing the figure of Bucky sitting on my bed staring at me with cold eyes.

"Where did you go?" I stop as his cold eyes stare hard at me.

"Out." I eye him as he stands up off my bed.

"You shouldn't leave." I walk closer as his eyes look empty. I take his hand.

"I'll always come back," I whisper his eyes flash to me as I see something flicker in them.

"Я чувствую, что знаю тебя. Я чувствую, что мечтал о тебе." My eyes lock onto his as I nod my head.

"Ты меня знаешь. Не борись с этим." I whisper back to him. His eyes flinch as he steps back from me.

He shakes his head as he closes his eyes.

"No, I don't." I sigh so he was back to factory settings mode.

"Well get to know me." He just stares at me as I smile. I hold out my hand to him.

"Come on." He eyes my hand as I hold it out to him.

"You can trust me." He slowly nods his head and places his hand in mine.

I smile as I close my hand around his.

"Let's go, Winter." He stops and eyes me.

"Winter?" I nod and smile.

"It's what I'll call you. Winter was always my favorite season." I smile. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think :) What do you think is instore :D


	11. Chapter 11: No Emotions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's see if Renee can get to Bucky

I was doing my best to try and get something to come alive in Bucky's mind, but it seemed those ten years of him being frozen did more damage then I liked.

It had been months since Bucky was unfrozen, he was doing rather well but still, he wasn't the same. He wasn't my Bucky.

One thing that did stay the same was he was broody, quiet, and well he seemed to act very protective and possessive of me when we were around others.

"Your strength is coming back good." I smile as he trains. I eye and watch him seeing his strength.

He just nods not answering me. I shake my head as the doors open and in walks Rumlow. He smirks and winks at me.

"How's he doing?" I look at Rumlow and just sigh.

"He's doing good what do you want Rumlow?" He smirks as he places his hand on the other side of me as I leaned against the wall.

"Just wanted to see you. See my girl." I roll my eyes as I kept one eye watching Bucky he seemed lost in what he was doing.

"Well, I don't see your girl here." He smirks as he places both hands now above me and leans his body into me. I stare at him as he brushes my ear with his lips.

"Oh, Renee... Oh, my little sweets if you only knew what they have in store for you and me." He goes to kiss me when a metal hand pulls him off me.

"Руки прочь от нее." I take a breath as Bucky well Winter shoves him down. Rumlow jumps up as he glares at Bucky.

"How dare you touch me Asset." He spits out as Bucky stands protectively in front of me. I place my hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay Winter. I think he's learned his lesson." Rumlow shoots me a look as he wipes the little bit of blood off his face.

"It doesn't matter when they order you, you'll comply." He smirks as he stalks off. I take a breath as Winter turns and eyes me his eyes full of fury.

"He shouldn't be touching you." I chuckle as he growls.

"I'm used to it Winter. He thinks he's all that, but I've handed his ass to him many times." His eyes don't change as he leans into me. I get lost in those eyes as his breath hits my ear and neck.

"He won't ever again." I feel my heart stop as his eyes bore into me.

"Come on Winter let's get out of here." He just nods as we head off together. I feel his eyes on my back as he walks behind me.

**==============**

They were taking Bucky off for some testing which meant I could head off for my daily walk and coffee.

I sit at the table sipping my coffee. I keep waiting for Nat to walk in, I hoped she would. 

"I just moved here; was curious do you recommend anything here?" I look up as I'm met with some beautiful blue eyes.

"Well, that depends on what you like." I smile as I sip my coffee. He smiles at me.

"Just looking at something to drink." I study him he was built like a tank. I eye him.

"I'd suggest if you're wanting a hot drink I think you'd like mocha or maybe Chi Tea, if your wanting a cold drink I'd suggest one of the many iced coffees or their iced teas are amazing." He smiles and nods his head at me.

"Thank you." I nod as he goes to order. I keep waiting for Nat. I frown, I hope she was okay.

"Mind if I sit with you?" I look up the blue eyes were back. I just nod I guess there was no harm in him sitting with me.

"So, do you come here often?" I nod as he smiles. His smile was very nice.

"I do as often as I can." He smiles and nods at me.

"What is your favorite drink?" I smile as I sit my coffee down.

"It's a White Chocolate Mocha." He smiles.

We make small talk as I realize Nat wasn't coming in. I hoped she was okay.

"I hope I didn't bore you." I smile and shake my head.

"Not at all. It was nice talking to you." His eyes glow, and his smile. God this man was attractive.

"Same, being new here and all. It was nice talking to you too." I smile as I start to get up.

"Maybe we could do this again?" I stop and smile and nod my head.

"Maybe." He stands up being a gentleman as I stand. I chuckle.

"I'm Steve." I smile.

"I'm Renee. Nice meeting you Steve." He smiles as I head out.

"Nice meeting you Renee." I stop and smile at him as I head out.

Time to clear my head as I do my walk. I did enjoy my walk a lot. It helped all this fresh air.

**==============**

I felt flushed after my walk as I walked the halls. I head into my room. Since the months Bucky had been awake, he had decided to move his bed into my room. Which was fine.

I open my door and head inside.

"You left again." I stop as I see him on his bed just staring at me. I sigh.

"Yes, you know this. I go for my walk and such." He just scuffs as he eyes me.

"You're flushed. Your cheeks are red." I roll my eyes as I go to the little bathroom my room had.

I stare in the mirror. Bucky stands in the doorway.

"What if you don't come back..." I stop and eye him.

"Why wouldn't I come back, Winter?" He just eyes me as he looks down. I walk closer to him.

"Why wouldn't I come back?" I whisper his eyes meet mine.

"What is there for you here?" He whispers. My heart stops as I reach out and grab his hand.

"You." His eyes meet mine as he shakes his head.

"No. We don't have emotions." I sigh and close my eyes as he stares hard at me.

"No emotions Renee." He snaps as I look down. So, we were back to that.

"You should know better." I look up at him as I try to hold in my emotions.

"Then maybe one day I won't come back. Since I have nothing here for me right?" I walk past him as his metal arm reaches out and pulls me tightly in his arms.

"You can't leave. You won't." I shake as his lips hit my ear. I feel his breath on me as he hovers over me.

"You won't leave me." I stare up at him as I break free from his hold.

"If we don't show emotion then why would I care about you?" I didn't mean what I said but he angered and upset me.

His eyes turn cold as he just turns his back to me.

"Winter...," I call out but he had already shut down. Great, this wasn't what I wanted. I close my eyes and just want to find something and scream into it.

**=====================**

One thing was certain Bucky well Winter was great at Brooding. He had ignored me and wouldn't give me the time of day. I hated it all.

I walk in and watch as Bucky trained with one of the agents. I smiled watching them.

"You should smile more." I roll my eyes hearing Rumlow again. I shoot him a glare as he stands by me.

"I would smile more if you weren't here." He grabs his heart and acts pained.

"Ouch right in the heart Sweet Cheeks." I roll my eyes but laugh at his reaction. He smiles

"AH! I made you laugh." I shake my head but smile as I catch Bucky/Winter's eyes.

Two can play this game Soldier. I turn to Rumlow and bat my eyes at him. I can feel the intense stare of Bucky from here as I pretend to flirt with Rumlow.

"Well, gee Sweets I need to make you laugh more." He smiles big at me as I put my spy skills to work and act like I'm flirting with him.

I smirk when he gets called off by someone. Before I could enjoy what I just did I feel a giant brute force throw me over their shoulder.

"Что ты думаешь? Бросайся на него!" I gasp as Bucky well no this was all Winter carries me away.

"Put me down Winter." He scuffs as he carries me to our room. He tosses me on my bed as I stare at him hard.

"What is your problem? You ignore me and now suddenly you want to talk to me? What happened to "We don't show emotions." I snap as he stares at me hard.

"You're better than that. Flirting with him. Throwing yourself at him." I roll my eyes as I smirk.

"You were jealous." He stops his eyes wide at me. I smirk.

"Jealous are we Winter?' I stand up and coo at him as I run my finger down his toned chest. His breathing deepens as I stare at him.

"Осторожно, не провоцируй меня." I smirk as I lean up and whisper in his ear.

"Осторожно, не провоцируй меня." I feel his eyes bore into me as I eye him.

He roughly pulls me into his arms as his lips attack mine. I wrap my arms around his neck as I kiss him back just as forceful and rough. He backs me into the wall as we kiss one another deeply and passionately.

I feel his lips go to my neck as I close my eyes. He stops as he nuzzles his face into my chest.

"So soft. So beautiful." He whispers. I smile as I run my fingers through his hair.

"You aren't bad yourself." He looks up at me as a small smile forms on his lips.

"Look at that you can smile." The smile starts to grow bigger.

Maybe I was finally getting to him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well she seems to be making progress let me know what you think :D


	12. Chapter 12: A Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoyed this chapter hope you do too

I woke up to a metal arm draped over my stomach. I smile. Bucky had started to have terrible nightmares I felt horrible, so I scooted my bed to his. Sometime in the night, we both rolled into each other and just cuddled. To be held and cuddled by someone was something else. Nat used to when I was little, but this was different, a different warm loving feeling.

I stare at his sleeping form. He looked so at peace when he slept. I run my fingers over his face.

"Oh, Bucky... I wish I could take all this pain away." I whisper. I watch him sleep. He was starting to dream again. I frown as I wrap my arms tightly around him.

"It's okay I'm here," I whisper. I feel his metal hand tighten around my body. I could feel his fingers pressing deep into my flesh. I didn't care, I just wanted to comfort him and make him feel safe.

"It's okay Winter," I whisper trying to get him relaxed. His metal hand squeezes hard into me as I wince at the pain.

His eyes snap open as he stares at me.

"Hey Winter, you were having a bad dream," I whisper his eyes take me in as he withdrawals his hand and looks at it then up at me.

"Did I hurt you?" he rasps out. I shake my head as I slowly set up, I wince a little causing Bucky to notice.

"You lie." He mutters as he reaches over and pulls up my shirt showing his hand idents where I'd have nice burses forming. He looks at them with disgust.

"I did that." I sigh and look at him.

"It was an accident Winter." He sets up as his eyes turn dark.

"You have burses from me." I take his hand.

"It's fine." He just gets off the bed and eyes me.

"No, it's not." He walks out of the room without a single word. I close my eyes and just grab a nearby pillow and scream into it.

**=================**

Nat had sent me a coded message saying she was away on a mission why we haven't met at our coffee shop. I felt relieved I was worried she was hurt.

I walk inside to get my coffee when I hear.

"Renee!" I stop and see Steve I smile as I walk over. Steve smiles big seeing me.

"One White Chocolate Mocha." He pushes it toward me. I smile as I take the cup.

"You remembered." He smiles big those big blue eyes glow at me. I take a seat.

"Of course, I remember how could I forget a pretty gal's like your's coffee?" I smile as I sip my coffee.

"You're a real gentleman." He chuckles. I enjoy his blue eyes they are beautiful.

"So, Renee... I was... Well... I'm not very good at this." He trails off I look up at him. I notice he's moving his cup around the table.

"You okay Steve?" He nods as he slowly looks up at me.

"I was just seeing if you'd want to go out on a date with me. I'm very rusty... I haven't had a date in years." He whispers.

I stare at him shocked. A date? I've only ever read about dates in books and the few movies I've seen. My eyes meet his as I smile.

"I'd like that." Steve smiles big as he looks relaxed again.

"Good. I was worried you'd say no." I chuckle as he takes a breath.

"Has anyone ever told you, how beautiful your brown eyes are?" I feel my cheeks redden.

"Has anyone ever told you, your eyes are as well?" He smiles at that as he leans forward.

"So, about that date?"

**=================**

I take a breath as I sit in the dark office.

"So you want a night out?" I nod my head.

"I don't ask for anything. I just would like to experience one thing in my life. I've only obeyed and followed your orders. Please." I watch as his shadow paces.

"Okay. But don't make me regret this. You have done a lot for us, and the progress you've done with The Winter Soldier hasn't gone unnoticed." I nod my head as I smile to myself.

**===============**

I stand in the little bathroom fixing myself up. I feel steel blue eyes on me from the doorway. I turn around as Bucky well no he's all Winter right now stands there.

"What are you doing?" I eye him as I do my best to make myself look somewhat nice.

"I'm going out." He tenses as I walk by him. His metal arm reaches out and grabs me.

"Out? At night?" He mutters as his eyes turn cold. I just simply pull my arm free as I walk to my bed to find shoes.

"Not safe." I roll my eyes as I slip on shoes.

"Well being here isn't safe, either right?" He stops as he eyes me. He stares at me as I get up.

"Don't wait up." I throw him a smile as I head out.

**==================**

I smile as I meet up with Steve. He offers me his arm.

"You look nice." I chuckle.

"You don't look bad yourself." Steve just smiles, that smile and those eyes. I felt like one of the girls in the many books I've read.

"So I had some ideas... Hoping you'll be down." I smile and nod.

Honestly a night out, away from everything I didn't care what we did. I was just excited about this.

I loop my arm through Steve's as I let him lead me wherever he wants.

Never noticing the figure that was watching our every move. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Winter Soldier Mode is activated lol someone is very jealous. Let me know what you think 🧡


	13. Chapter 13: Mine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Renee goes on a date with Steve and Bucky/Winter gets very jealous also some mentions about forced pregnancy you've been warned.

**Renee's POV**

I can't stop laughing as Steve tries to get the ball in the hole.

"I was never good at miniature golf." I chuckle as I watch Steve's ball hit the little lake again.

"I'm no better." I smile as I try and get my ball in the hole. Steve just smiles as I let myself just enjoy and this. Something I've never experienced before.

"Well look at you, you almost got the ball in the hole." I laugh as Steve just smiles; he takes my hand as we walk to the next hole.

"I hope this isn't boring." I look at him and shake my head.

"Not boring at all." I smile as Steve never let's go of my hand. I could get lost in those blue eyes of his.

"You feeling up for some food?" I nod and smile.

**=======================**

**Winter's POV**

My eyes just watch them, what was this I was feeling? No emotions I was told, but yet I was feeling something, and I didn't like it one bit. I let out a low growl when that man touches her, no one should ever touch her.

No one expect me. I growl more as she smiles, her eyes seemed so happy.

**===============**

Renee's POV

I enjoyed my night with Steve, he was different and kind. He was very charming.

"I had an amazing night tonight." I smile as I nod my head.

"I did too Steve," I whisper he gently cups my cheeks as he leans in and kisses me. I close my eyes as I let him kiss me. We gently pull apart as he just smiles at me.

"Wow, I..." I chuckle as Steve just blushes.

"I hope we can do this again." He whispers I nod my head.

"Goodnight Steve." I smile as Steve kisses my cheek.

"Good night Renee." I smile as I walk off feeling giddy inside.

This was how my female characters in books felt when they went on dates and got kissed. I smiled as I walked.

I was so lost in my thoughts I never saw him coming.

I feel a hard force grab me and pull me against a tree as I look up into those steel blue eyes.

"Winter?" I whisper as he glares at me. I eye him.

"Who was that man? He touched you and kissed you." He growls. I just stare at him and sigh.

"It was just a date, Winter," I whisper as his eyes just take me in.

"Date? What is a date?" I chuckle.

"A date is when you take someone out that you like you show them a good time." Winter's eyes just start to do something as his face does some strange emotion.

"I see." I nod my head when Winter suddenly grabs me.

"A date huh." I feel him pull me close as he leans in.

"I'll take you on a date." My eyes widened as he kisses me. I close my eyes as I kiss him deeply his fingers tangle in my hair as I kiss him back.

"Winter..." I whimper as he kisses up my neck. I feel his lips on my ear as he whispers.

"Is this a good date?" I chuckle. As I cup his cheeks.

"It's not really a date but it's sweet of you to try." He growls as he grabs my hand.

"Winter..." He just drags me along with him as I watch him. He walks me through the little park. I stop.

"Wait." He turns to me as I smile at him.

"You want a date huh?" He nods. I smile as I swirl my fingers up in the air and have golden orbs up in the sky. He looks up at them as I smile at him.

"Golden." He whispers I nod as I pull out the little iPod thing I was given and turn on some music.

"I know this." I smile as I hold out my hand to him. He pulls me close as he buries his face in my chest. I run my fingers through his hair as he just holds me close swaying me close.

"I've done this before haven't I?" He whispers I nod and smile.

"Yes, you were a huge charmer back in your day Bucky." He stops as I say his name. His eyes take me in.

"Bucky?" I smile and nod he just sighs as he holds me tightly.

"Have we met before? The way you've always looked at me, makes me feel like we have." I nod my head as my eyes water. I feel his finger wipe them.

"What happened my little Golden?" I look up at him with sad eyes.

"You never wanted emotions, you told me the same and yet because of me, you developed emotions. Because of me they took you from me and wiped your memory and it was all my fault. I'm so sorry Bucky." I start to cry as he pulls me tight and I bury my face in his chest.

"Тсс Не плачь, Мой Золотой. Это была не твоя вина."

"I never left your side; I'd read to you every day for the last 10 years or so." I feel his eyes just stare at me as he holds me tight like I was a balloon who would fly away.

"I want to remember." He whispers I look up and smile at him.

"I'll help you remember Bucky." He smiles as he kisses my head.

"But when we are in the training room or around others you have to act cold and emotionless. Okay."

He stares deeply in my eyes and nods his head.

"Okay."

=======================

Winter's POV

I still wasn't sure, but my mind was starting to show me things. Renee said my name was Bucky, she'd only call me that when we were alone together. Holding her in my arms was the best feeling I've ever had.

I never wanted to let her go. I felt this urge whenever I was with her like I only wanted to keep her safe and never let her go. It drove me nuts seeing Rumlow eye her the way he did, he only had one thing on his mind when it came to her and it sickened me.

"Renee is in her 20's I feel it's time." My heart stops. Time for what?" I slowly lean against the wall so the two doctors or whatever you call them.

"She's checked out healthy, I believe it is time yes." Time for what? My heart races.

"Now the question is who do we get? Any child she has should be powerful." My heart beats fast what did they want with her?

"Well I'd love the Winter Soldier to be the one, but I worry he can't, we had tried before with other subjects, but they never took. It is possible Renee could, but we need to ensure we have one now. Then we could worry about testing her with the Winter Soldier later."

My body shakes, tests? What?

"Then who will be the one?" I take a breath.

"Rumlow has passed all our tests and has passed the health screen. He is perfect for this. We believe best on his tests and Renee's they'd have a healthy child."

I nearly put a hole in the wall. They want Renee to... My mind spins as I storm out of there. I needed to find her. I walk to our room and shove the door open.

She looks up at me from reading her book as I stalk to her.

"What's going on Bucky?" I pull her tightly in my arms.

"I need to put a baby in you before Rumlow can." She pulls back and just stares at me.

"What?" I cup her cheeks as I kiss her my fingers running over her.

"Let me make a baby with you. I don't want him ever touching you." I growl as I kiss her pinning her to the bed.

She just stares at me and cups my cheeks.

"Oh Bucky, relax. He won't ever get that far." I nuzzle her neck as I just hold her tight.

"Your mine Golden," I whisper Renee smiles as she looks up at me.

"Only yours Bucky." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhoh... What will happen next to our couple


	14. Chapter 14: La Vi En Rose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brace yourself this chapter :(

**Renee's POV**

Being cuddled in Bucky's arms was heaven. It became our thing at night he'd hold me close and I'd bury myself deep in his big arms.

"Stop staring." He mumbles I chuckle as I burrow myself deep in his arms and lay my head on his chest.

"I'm sorry just love looking." I see a smile form on his lips. I listen to his heartbeat and smile as his hold on me tightens.

"Go back to sleep Golden." I smile.

"What do you remember today?" I try to wiggle free to grab the notebook, but he stops me.

"Later sleep now." I sigh but nod. Sleep didn't sound too bad, not when it meant being in his arms.

**==================**

I lay with my feet in the air writing things and doodling in my notebook.

"Natalia you said she escaped? Why didn't she take you with her?" I sigh and take a breath.

"I told her to leave me, I chose to stay." Bucky's eyes widen as he lets out a growl. He walks up to me as he takes the book out of my hands.

"You could have escaped this place? When how old were you?" I jump at his sudden reaction.

"Bucky... It's not a big deal..." He cuts me off.

"Not a big deal, I wanted a better a life for you I wanted you out of here and you had a chance and you stayed for what? Why did you stay?" I fiddle with my fingers as I take a breath and look up at him.

"For you. I didn't want you to be alone." He stops he shakes his head and looks at me.

"That's not a reason, no you." He runs his fingers through his hair as he just stares at me with rage.

"I stayed for you and I don't regret it." His eyes take me in as I crawl in his lap and wrap my arms around him and just hold him tight. He buries his face in my chest I feel his body shake and trembling under my touch.

"Ты слишком чист, моя золотая девушка." I smile and just kiss his head as his eyes peek up at me.

"I told you I planned to marry you someday my Winter Prince." He chuckles as he cups my cheeks and just kisses me deeply. I wrap my arm tightly around his neck as he flips me over gently and kisses me. He rests his head against mine.

"I will get you and me out of here." I smile and nod.

"I plan on it." I smile and stare in his eyes as I lean up and kiss him again.

"Bucky? Will you go on a date with me?" He stops and eyes me funny.

"Okay, but how?" I smile at him.

"Leave that to me." He smiles and nods his head.

"I'd love to Doll." My eyes widen at that.

"Doll huh?" He smirks.

**========================**

I grab Bucky's head as I have him follow me.

"Just be quiet." I smile at him as I held his hand and drag him through my secret little escape.

"This is the park." I nod my head as I retrieve my little stash.

"I made us a picnic." Bucky smiles as I lay the blanket over on the grass. He watches me.

"Doll how many times have you snuck out?" I chuckle and look up at him.

"Since I was 16, sometimes Nat would meet me here too, and we'd talk and plan our next move and such. We had a plan once you woke up, now we can set that plan in motion." Bucky just stares at me as he walks over.

"They never broke you." He whispers I smile and shake my head.

"Never." I pat the spot next to me as Bucky sits down, I lay my head on his shoulder as I relax. I feel his finger trace my skin as I snuggle close into him.

"I'm glad they never broke you." I smile as Bucky kisses my head.

"I always imagined someday doing this with you," I whisper as Bucky smiles.

I swirl my fingers around and send up golden orbs Bucky watches them and smiles as he pulls me into his lap. I feel his lips trace my skin as I lean into him.

"My Golden Girl." He whispers as his lips kiss me all over. I smile.

"What were dates like when you went on them Bucky?" I whisper as he takes a breath.

"Different, but I like this date better. It was fun you know, took the girls dancing, tried to get Steve to come but he wouldn't or he'd just sulk if he came. Sometimes I'd take the girl out for a milkshake." My eyes widen.

"What's a milkshake? Is it like Hot coco?" Bucky chuckles but his eyes get sad.

"I promise I'll get you a milkshake you'll love it." He cups my cheeks as I snuggle close into him.

"Will you take me dancing too?" I whisper Bucky smiles and nods.

"Whatever you want my Golden Doll."

**===================**

**Bucky's POV**

I hated this act of being cold and emotionless as I trained with Renee. I didn't like pretending that I didn't care.

I pin her down on the matt and chuckle quietly as I brush my lips down her. Renee gasps at me as she eyes me. I smirk at her as I lean down and kiss her.

"Bucky." She quietly mumbles I just smirk.

"What Golden?" She eyes me as I lean down.

"I see your training is coming along quite nicely." My eyes look up as that same man stands there. He was a lot older now. Renee slowly stands up her eyes widen as she casts them down.

"It's okay you can stare at me." Renee slowly looks up as the man eyes us both.

"You've done well with our Asset here. You have made us proud." Renee nods as I tense, I didn't like his look at all. 

"We have great things planned for you Little Golden." Renee nods as I shoot him a look.

"As for you Asset listen to her and obey her." He nods and walks off. Renee looks at me as I feel my arm losing control. She grabs it and holds it.

"Just breath okay." I nod my head as I close my eyes. I look at Renee as I take a breath.

"Can I take you out tonight?" She smiles and nods.

"Of course." I smile as I look around and pull her close.

"Wear dancing shoes." She chuckles at me.

**===================**

I take her to the same spot I stole that thing she used last time. I wasn't sure what it was but I was trying to figure it out. Renee eyes me and smiles.

"Do you need help Bucky?" I sigh and hand her the odd device. She smiles as she scrolls through it, I watch her with curious eyes.

"What exactly is this?" She looks up and smiles.

"They call it an iPod. It stores music and plays it." I just nod as she smiles.

"Much like a record player in your day, just different." I just nod again. She smiles as she scrolls through the music.

"Here we go perfect. I love this version; this version of this song is perfect for dancing." I eye her as she smiles as she sets things up.

"Doll this was my..." She shakes me off.  
  
"Let me help." I just smile watching her.

"You will have to show me how dancing works." I chuckle as I nod.

"Ready for me Doll?" Renee smiles at me and nods.

"Yes." I hold out my hand to her as she grabs it I pull her close as she hits the button. This music sounded familiar.

"It reminds me of my time." She smiles and nods as I hold her close as I sway with her. I smile as I spin her around. She was so beautiful I watch her captivated by her, Renee spins back into my arms. I smile as I kiss her when she spins into me again.

"You're really good at this Bucky." I smile as I hold her close.

"Helps I have a great partner." Renee blushes as I kiss her again. I hold her tightly and close my eyes.

"I want a life with you Doll," I whisper.

"Me too." I smile as I vow right there under the stars, I'd get a life with her. She deserved that a life free of Hydra.

**====================**

I hold her hand tightly as we walk back into the base, I steal a kiss again, we can't keep our eyes off each other.

"It appears you two have broken our rules." I tense as I see him standing there. His eyes flash to Renee and me. Rumlow walks out as he glares at me, I quickly put Renee behind me.

"Renee, you were supposed to make him better not this," I growl as the man smirks.

"No worries, our plans will still work. Project Insight will still happen." He snaps his fingers as other guards appear; I fight them as Renee does the same.

"Rumlow now." Rumlow points a laser right on Renee's chest my eyes widen as I shoot them a look.

"Pierce no, let her go you have me let her be." I snap he smirks.

"We need her just as much as we need you. You two Golden and Winter I assumed she had grown out of it all, I underestimated you and her. Feelings and desires, there is no place for them here, now if you want her to live and not be blood splatter on the ground you will do what I ask." My eyes fill with fury as Renee shakes her head.

"No don't save yourself." She pleads I look at her as I cup her cheeks and kiss her head. Rumlow glares at me. As I Stare in her big brown eyes.

"I can't lose you," I whisper I look at Pierce.

"I'll do anything." He smirks.

"Good wipe him of all his memories, he needs to be ready for his mission. Lock Renee up till we decide what her punishment."

Renee screams and fights as they take me away from her, I didn't want to forget my memories of her but if she lived that was all that mattered.

"Bucky" She screams and fights as I close my eyes and quietly.

"Я найду тебе мою куклу с золотисто-коричневыми глазами.." I whisper as I let the men drag me to get my memory wiped. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :( I know I know


End file.
